all.things.fadra

I love blogging. In fact, if someone wants to buy me a t-shirt that says that, I’ll wear it. I often profess my love of blogging and today is no different.

Oh blogging, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

1. I love writing. Excuse me. I love writing what I like to write when I like to write it.
2. I love having my own little online world that reflects me (design, content, widgets).
3. I love working on Wordpress. Yes, you read that right.
4. I love fiddling around behind the scenes and will even dabble in code if it works out in my favor.
5. I love data and analytics.
6. I love reading comments knowing that someone took the time to read and leave feedback.
7. I love meeting the people behind the blogs.
8. I love interacting with people on Twitter, getting to know their personality, and then connecting with their blog.
9. I love learning about blogging.
10. I love discovering companies that get blogging.

Shall I go on? I don’t think so. I think you get the point. I’m sure you have many of the same feelings or else you wouldn’t be blogging in the first place (assuming that the majority of people that read my blog probably have a blog of their own).

I have to re-emphasize, though, that the coolest part of blogging is the people. You ask a question? You get an answer. You need some help? You get advice. Having a bad day? You get a hug. Bloggers help other bloggers. Am I right?

But wouldn’t it be great if we could single out some bloggers we admire – bloggers who are great writers, bloggers who make people laugh, bloggers who have incredibly high traffic, bloggers who get technology, bloggers that work with the media – and get them to let us in on some of their secrets?

In case you have never taken the time to read my About Me page (what? you haven’t?), I’ll sum it up for you. I’m experienced in writing, technology, and marketing. And generally, I like to share what I know. I’m willing to bet that there are lots of other people out there that want to do the same. It may not occur to them. Or they may not have the right outlet.

Here’s where I come in. I want to start a series called Bloggers Helping Bloggers and feature a Q&A session with these wunderkinds. What I need from you is this:

Good idea? Yes or No.

What do you want to learn about the most?

Who should I put on my list to hound until they agree?

Leave me a comment. Email me. Tweet me. Let me know what you think.

Oh, and while you’re at it, maybe you can help send me to the Type A Mom conference this month. Me like learning. Me like sharing. I wrote a post, Confessions of a Blog Conference Attendee, and entered for a chance to win a ticket to attend the conference. If you like my post, please vote for me over at Blog Conference Newbie (it’s a simple click).

Driving along the infamous Capital Blvd. into the downtown area of the great city of Raleigh, you will find some questionable businesses. Here is evidence of one.

My only question is this:

WHERE IS ROBERT AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH HIM?

Poor Dew Motors. I thought of offering my social media skills to them because they looked like business could use a little help. But then I was afraid of what Ken might do to me if it backfired.

That's me. Listenly so intently.

I’ve bragged plenty about how fortunate I am to live in Raleigh, NC where the social media scene is quite hoppin’. As a result of this hoppin’ scene, there is usually no shortage of social media events, usually free. I try to take advantage of them when I can. It’s fun. It’s social. It’s people who get the “geekspeak” of blogging and Twitter.

So when I saw ramblings on Twitter of a Raleigh event with a hashtag of #WPhackathon, I just knew I had to insert myself into the conversation. What is it? Where is it? How do I get to go?

The cool thing about this town is that they don’t discriminate when it comes to social media. Phil Buckley, who most of us affectionately refer to as “1918” decided to host a Wordpress Hackathon where nerds bloggers, like us, could get together and

talk about all things Wordpress.

Phil was great in that he encouraged all knowledge levels of Wordpress, including Wannabe, Newbie, User, Veteran, Master. I picked the boring title of User but I loved that we had all sort of people in the room. Over 80 people to be exact. Phil took us through some tips and tricks. We talked about plug-ins. We talked a lot about plug-ins. And then we had some giveaways and chatted for the rest of the night.

First of all, thanks to Phil and to Michael Torbert, who hooked me up with my fabulous prize, All-in-One SEO Pack. Secondly, I had a call for any questions you would like me to try to have answered. I can’t say I got answers but here’s the closest information I could get for you.

Question:

Melissa from Adventuroo asked about having a different column layout for different pages on her Thesis-themed blog.

The answer?

While I didn’t get to ask the question, I won’t let Melissa go without an answer. The short answer is yes, you can do it. In fact, I found a tutorial that shows exactly how to create multiple custom page templates. I took one look and decided that the same layout on all pages is just fun for me. For now.

On a related note, I also found out that you can have different widgets displayed on different pages. Currently, the default is to show everything on every page. The downside? Every time someone clicks on a page, you make a call to the database asking what widgets to display. This results in slower performance on your blog.

Question:

C. Mom from C. Mom: a day in the life wanted to know if there was a way to use “continue reading” or “read more” on pages other than your home page.

The answer?

Luckily, before I had time to answer, Phil stepped in and posted his response:

The easy way is to use a theme that has that functionality already in it, but if not, you can choose to display just and excerpt then have a “read more” link. To do that will involve changing the code on your homepage.

I’ll have more on themes at the end of this post.

Question:

Melisa from Mommy This and That had the age-old question of Blogger versus Wordpress. Should she make the move and what would she lose in the transition?

The answer?

Again, Phil beat me to the punch with this one:

If you are moving from a blogger.com or tumblr type of blog, then yes, there is a chance so people will not be able to find your new address right away, but you can work around those issues.

Start writing about your upcoming move for about a month before you switch, mention it in your newsletter and if possible have people who have linked to you change those links!

If you are using the Google Webmaster Tools, you can also let Google know you’re moving so they can update their search results.

Moving from blogger to Wordpress is like moving from the minor leagues to the big leagues.

Phil, being an SEO expert, knows a lot about being found and not being found. I think it’s a matter of preference truly. I moved to Wordpress because my blog was so new and I knew I wanted to take it places that Blogger couldn’t go. I didn’t lose anything except my Google Friends (which was very small anyway). I did have a few formatting issues and my categories and tags were a mess (since Blogger uses on “labels”) but in the end, I like to get my hands dirty and I’m glad I made the move.

Now for my quick and dirty assessment of the hackathon. With 80+ people, it was hard to get to your specific questions. Some things flew over my head and others were too basic. I was looking forward to the open discussion time at the end but with the door prize giveaway and the desire to head to the latest watering hole, those of us left ended up socializing a bit and then parted company.

The biggest takeaway from the session was this: if you are somewhat serious about your blog, invest in a good theme. Buy Thesis or buy a Premium theme. You want something that has support and will be maintained. My blog? Free theme. It’s fine. I like the design. I’ve modified it a bit. But it is quirky. I’ve done some random behind-the-scenes kind of stuff and I’m lucky it works. Also? I have NOT upgraded to Wordpress 3.0.

What that means for me? I’m looking to keep the same look and feel but move to Thesis. It’s what we use over on Lives Less Ordinary and I’ve come to like it.

Other random notes I took:

• Not sure if a plug-in will work with your version of Wordpress, look at Wordpress.org crowdsourced plug-in data
• To improve blog performance, check out WP Super Cache plug-in
• To reduce spam, install Cookies for Comments plug-in
• For better SEO, you can specific the title tag and meta description for each post. Better yet, some paid plug-ins can tell you what those should be based on your post content
• Also, for SEO, frontload your keywords in upper left of the post title and post content
• Genesis is a theme framework similar to Thesis that is gaining traction thanks to Chris Brogan’s recent switch
• Multiple plug-ins exists to display your most popular posts. Helps drive traffic to older content.
• For additional analytics on your blog, use the Wordpress.com Stats plug-in.

Most of these things, I haven’t done or tried or tested. But I plan to. I guess I have my work cut out for me. At least I like this stuff.

Sounds weird, I know. I have one child. He’s my one and only. So where did the sibling come from? I borrowed one.

My blogging buddy, Sue, had the great fortune of her husband surprising her with a day out at a concert in town. On the sly, he contacted a bunch of her friends and arranged for some babysitting services. They have two adorable kids that you can read all about on Sue’s blog, Motherhood and Me: Misa Misa and Queen B. I think her husband, in all his infinite wisdom, realized that two adorable kids on top of our own might be a little much to handle. So he broke up the Round Up gang and chose me to watch Queen B.

Queen B for the Day

Queen B is an 18 month old little girl who is as cute as the day is long. And she knows it. For some reason, she loves me. Maybe it’s because I make funny faces and weird noises and giggle at her nonstop. And when I had the pleasure of watching her on Saturday from 3pm until midnight, I got just a small taste of what life with two kids might be like. In fact, I got more than that.

This was an especially interesting occasion for me. It felt like it was a trial run on a couple of fronts:

• I’ve never had the chance to mother a little girl. In fact, I’ve never changed a girl’s diaper. While I understand the concept, it just feels foreign to me.

• I’ve never been responsible for two kids at the same time. I have watched Misa Misa for a bit when he stayed to play with Evan. That was easy. They’re the same age. And I did babysit multiple kids in my younger babysitting days. But when you’re getting paid $3/hour, it’s not really the same. You kind of ignore the kids and sit and read the good parts of the mom’s romance novels. This is why I’ll never hire a teenager to babysit my son.

• I’ve never experienced the gamut of what it would be like to take care of two kids that are spaced appropriately to actually be siblings. What I’m trying to say is I got to watch Evan interact with Queen B as if she was his little sister. Be still my heart.

So how did the evening pan out? Like a dream. Queen B had no problem saying bye-bye to Mom (sorry, Sue). She was happy to follow me and Evan around. She explored every room in the house. She tried to do all the things she shouldn’t do (climbing dangerous things, putting small objects in her mouth, tormenting the dog). I was able to head her off at the pass. Every time. I’ve been around the block. You can’t fool me.

And off I went to finish my vacuuming. She was fine with that. Sue is a fanatical vacuumer so I knew she was probably accustomed to the routine. Then I pulled out my carpet cleaner. Yeah. Not so much. She was fine at first. Then she wanted me to hold her while I cleaned. It was so cute. I felt so needed. Then my arm got tired.

I set her down and continued on. She then made it clear that she did NOT want me to continue. And I felt like I probably shouldn’t torture her anymore. The carpet will still be waiting for me tomorrow. And then she accidentally pressed the ON button for the carpet cleaner. I think she thought she was bringing the house down. Poor thing.

We played outside with the water table. We ate an age-appropriate dinner (macaroni & cheese with a side of pizza). We took a bath. She still has the clean baby smell when she gets out of the tub. Then I read her some books and we cuddled and I laid her down for the night. It took an hour but she happily played and chatted upstairs until she conked out.

Sounds like a perfect day, right?

It was so precious to watch Evan act like a “big brother.” He kept an eye on Queen B, tried to get her to talk, made silly faces at her. Then he got mad at her when she accidentally got him wet at the water table. So he decided to playfully soak her. Completely soak her.

We went inside to dry off and started playing peekaboo. She giggled every time and so did I. And then Evan wanted to play. I hate to say it but it’s just not as cute when a 3 1/2 year old plays peekaboo. Everything Queen B did to make me laugh, Evan tried to do in an effort to make me laugh.

And on it went all night. At bath time, he tried to take charge. At book time, he kept butting in. At bedtime, he didn’t want to leave. He did NOT like sharing Mommy’s attention.

And as for Mommy? I definitely felt the novelty of a new kid in the house. I can break out all of my old tricks and they’re new to her. The laughs were all new. And the cuddles. Did I mention the cuddles? I think the toughest thing, though, was making sure I wasn’t giving the younger one the attention at the expense of the older one. You know what? It’s hard.

While I started the evening thinking, I could do this. I could totally handle two kids. I ended the evening thinking, gee, it’s nice to get back to my relatively simple life. And as for all you moms out there with more than one? I salute you. May your husband someday surprise you with a day out and a night off. You all deserve it.

Hi. My name is Fadra. And I have a problem.

I started this whole blogging thing last September with a pretty lame post called “What’s My Theme?” I was trying to explain that I didn’t have a theme and it didn’t matter because it was my blog and it was really just for fun.

Then I got pressured into going to Bloggy Boot Camp in February. I kept explaining to all of the other bloggers that I wasn’t really a blogger. I just had a blog. It was different. In the end, the day was fun. I learned a little. And then something happened. Something clicked. And I decided to really start blogging.

I moved to Wordpress all by myself. I wrote every week, sometimes every day. I got invited to go to BlogHer. Tickets were sold out and the hotel was sold out but the stars aligned and I was able to go. I met so many amazing people that I came back more inspired than ever.

I also came back wanting to go to the next blogging conference. And the next. And the next. As it turns out, I’m going to Bloggy Boot Camp again in Philadelphia on September 11th. I’m thrilled to go because I know I’ll get to see many women that I met the first time around but didn’t really “meet” since I was so busy apologizing for not being a real blogger.

Next up is the Type-A Mom Conference. I’m certainly a Type A personality. I’m definitely a Mom. It’s definitely a conference in my home state (North Carolina). But I am technically unemployed. My husband loves me but there is only so far he will let me go with these blogging conferences before I need to bring home some serious man-swag.

So here I am, telling you that you have the power to help me fulfill my dream of attending yet one more blogging conference. And why should you help me?

• I am unemployed (see above) which means limited income.
• My ex-boss was really a super jerk who jaded me from ever wanting to work at an office job ever again.
• I can learn really cool things about the business of blogging which is what I’m totally fascinated with these days.
• I will then be able to spend my days with a Mai Tai in one hand and a laptop in the other.

I forgot the best part. I’m a blogger (yes, I will freely admit that now). What I experience inspires me to write. So what I learn, I will share. And when I figure out this whole blogging thing, I’ll host my own conference and the Mai Tais are on me.

In case you are wondering, you can win a ticket to Type-A Mom Conference in Asheville, NC on September 24th-26th. Read about the contest and enter to win!

Don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when when I'm angry.

Just so you know, my life is not all lollipops and sunshine. While I try to find the silver lining in every cloud, I don’t always do that. Because things bug me. A lot.

We all have those little buttons that get pushed from time to time. I used to curse like a sailor whenever I got in the car. To call it road rage would be extreme, but let me just say this to all the other drivers out there: I’m glad you couldn’t hear me. Once I had a child, I cleaned it up. A little. Then I stopped my daily commute (re: unemployment) and found that my frustrations disappeared quite a bit.

But I still have some pet peeves. These things just bug me. I’m not saying I’m perfect or without flaws. (You can say it, though, if you feel really compelled). And I’m not even saying my pet peeves aren’t hypocritical. But they are mine. So watch out.

1. People who make me late

Okay, stop laughing. I know you know that I am eternally late to everything in my entire life. But that’s when I am at fault. If I happen to be ready to go somewhere earlier than whoever I am going with, I don’t mind waiting. But don’t make me late. That’s my job. If I am early or even on time for something, please don’t screw it up for me. Yes, I should have much more tolerance because I know I have made others late on numerous occasions. I guess I’m just weird like that.

2. Crooked bumper stickers

While I’m on the car kick, I’ll have to admit that I’m not a fan of bumper stickers. I guess if you have an old ratty car and it lends to the charm, then go right ahead. Generally speaking, I think it cheapens the car. However, if you MUST put a bumper sticker on your car, please, please take the time to put it on straight. And while you’re at it? Once the election is over, you can stop your campaigning. Those stickers have to go.

3. Unprepared people at an airport ticket and/or airport security line

I used to travel a fair amount for business so I got pretty good at the whole process. And one day, someone put it so plainly for me as to why I get so frustrated. People who travel for leisure, or don’t travel at all, pack for an airplane the way they would for a car trip. You know the type. They frequently use grocery bags as carry-ons. And when they are asked for their ID, they have to to dig through mounds of receipts and old gum in their purse to get it even though they just had it out.

4. Hair in a hotel bathroom

I know that there are thousands of people that have stayed in my hotel room before I get there. I’ve seen all the reports about the microscopic things they leave behind. But for me? It’s the hair. The hair reminds me that someone else has slept in this bed and washed their bits and pieces in this shower. It grosses me out. I know that housekeeping can’t possibly get every speck of everything but it still drives me nuts.

5. People thinking that Miracle Whip is an acceptable substitute for mayonnaise

Oddly enough, I won a t-shirt from Miracle Whip recently on Twitter for tweeting about my preference of mayonnaise over Miracle Whip. I don’t know where Miracle Whip comes from but word to the wise, if you ask me if I want mayo, it better be just that. Miracle Whip is entirely different.

6. Unsupervised children

I’m going to sound like a total snot here. But I don’t love all kids. Some kids annoy me. The unsupervised ones especially annoy me. Just because I’m a grown-up doesn’t mean I will watch your kids if you don’t feel like it. If you are at the playground, watch your kids. If you are at a playdate, watch your kids. If you are in a store, or restaurant, or any public place, watch your kids. Don’t worry. I will step in a prevent them from running into traffic, but other then that you’re on your own.

7. Using an upside down M as a W on a sign

They are two different letters. You’re not fooling anyone.

8. Fundraising kids

I did it. You probably did it. But do you really want your kids walking door to door selling magazines and overpriced crap all in the name of a fundraiser? The sad part is that the fundraising company bathes in money, the school gets a small portion, and the kids actually think they are going to win fabulous prizes if they sell more than anyone else. My one exception to the rule: Girl Scout cookies. You girls can keep coming around and I will keep buying.

9. Auto DM

If you are on Twitter, you already get this. I have never met a single, solitary person on Twitter who thinks these are a good idea. And no matter how much you personalize it and try to make it sound conversational, we all know it’s an auto DM. So just stop already.

10. Improper procedures in a public restroom

Ladies – I’m talking to you. You know who you are. You are the ones that can’t bear to sit on the toilet seat. So you stand and attempt to do what only men are meant to do standing up. The result? That toilet seat covered in the remains of the day. That’s bad enough. But can you at least wipe it off? Do you think the next lovely lady wants to wipe your urine off the seat? And while you’re at it, flush. Use your foot. You can do it.

And there you have it. My “just 5 things” pet peeve list. Oh, I have 10 things on the list? I thought you would never notice. Let me just say that once I got started, I had a hard time stopping. Next week, I’ll be back to rainbows and lollipops.

I love a good story with a happy ending. I love it even more when it involves social media and customer service. But I can’t spill the beans right away. I have to make you read through irrelevant personal history before I get to my point. Because it’s my blog. And I can do that.

I’ve had a long love affair with McDonald’s. It started when I was growing up in rural southern Maryland. When I say rural, I mean that you waved at everyone you passed on the road whether you knew them or not. You left your doors unlocked at night. You didn’t go to the movies because you didn’t have a movie theater. And most of your shopping was done through the Sears catalog store, because real stores were nowhere to be found. We had one traffic light and one fast food restaurant in the entire county.

We had Hardee’s, which was adequate. It was sufficient. But one day, right across from my middle school, a McDonald’s was built.

(Cue the trumpets)

What is Grimace, anyway?

No big deal, right? Oh, it was. The town had a parade to celebrate the opening. Yes. A parade. The parade was well-attended and talked about for years mainly because we all remember Grimace fainting during the parade. Apparently that big purple suit can be quite hot.

McDonald’s was so popular that they had to remodel and expand in less than 2 years. When I was feeling really daring in high school, I would skip chemistry and go hang out at McDonald’s. I loved the characters (Hamburgler, the Fry Guys, Mayor McCheese), I loved the kids’ areas (seating booths in a ship, tree stumps as stool, and the good old fashioned playground outside), and I loved those pies. I don’t care about calories or trans fats or anything. I miss those deep fried cherry pies.

Side note: When I visited China, I found that the McDonald’s there still makes the deep fried pies. My favorite flavor was taro root.

Let’s be honest. McDonald’s has done a pretty good job at evolving with the times. They ditched their styrofoam packaging to help save the ozone layer. They offered us innovative products: McRib, McDLT, McPizza. They gave us healthier choices: Fruit & Yogurt Parfait, Apple Dippers, Grilled Chicken Snack Wraps (I did have a chance to sample their new oatmeal with fruit that they are offering this fall. I was actually quite tasty). They have installed a playland at many McDonald’s, recognizing that the restaurant is truly a kid’s world.

When it comes to marketing, they seem to be keeping up quite nicely as well. McDonald’s plays in the social media world very well. And I can vouch for that because I was on the receiving end of a pretty nice customer service experience. Here’s how it played out.

McDonald’s is offering superhero Happy Meal toys. Brilliant, McDonald’s. Because my 3 year old is a mega-superhero fan and thus we must procure the entire collection.

Can you name them all?

So off we go to the mall for a Happy Meal. I sit my little Evan down with his meal and tell him NO TOY until he eats his lunch. I grab something that’s a little less cheeseburgery-frenchfryish. When I look up, I see Evan with the saddest face I’ve ever seen, red eyes, and tears running down his face.

I thought for sure that he was going to have a fuss about which character he got. Instead, he shows me they put in the Littlest Pet Shop toy. A girl toy. Apparently, that’s quite devastating when you were expecting a superhero.

I thought it was kind of funny so I tweeted about it:

A very short while later, I got a tweet from Katie at McDonald’s offering sympathy and amends. She sent me a DM saying she could fix that and send me a new superhero and which one would I like and what’s my son’s name and what’s his favorite thing from McDonald’s and would it be alright to send him a little treat.

#1 Totally not expecting that. It is just a simple toy after all. But it means a lot to Evan. And I have eaten my fair share of cheeseburgers trying to get him all the characters.

#2 I was able to ask for the elusive “Wolverine” which is the character Evan has really been searching for.

"Now, my collection is complete" (insert evil laugh)

#3 Katie sent a personal handwritten note to Evan and me along with a card for a free dessert.

#4 She sent it exactly when she said she would.

It’s true. My feelings about the experience and the responsiveness will translate into repeat visits. I like knowing that a company cares. Yes, it’s in the name of business. They want my business. I have no beef with that. Treat me like you care about my business and you are much more likely to get it.

Happy kid means a happy mom

And finally, hats off to McDonald’s for not only embracing social media, but actually getting social media. It’s about connecting with customers and engaging them. They connected. I’m engaged. I’m lovin’ it.

I’ve just pulled the oldest marketing trick in the book. I did a bait and switch. You see, I’m not entirely sure how I define “hacking a Wordpress blog” or even if I have the skills to say that I have done it/can do it. But here’s what I can tell you.

I live in Raleigh, North Carolina. That’s nice, Fadra, you say. It’s the South. It’s hot and humid. People here drink sweet tea and like to eat vinegar with their barbecue (yuck). So what the heck is a nice Yankee like me doing in a place like this? Besides the low cost of living, the location of our house, and my husband’s job, Raleigh has a pretty kickin’ social media scene.

I was made aware of this almost a year ago when I started stumbling across the likes of Wayne Sutton around town. Then there were the Media Leaders events held that were overflowing with tweeters and bloggers. Finally, when I was at BlogHer, along with a dozen or so of my hometown peeps, I heard how lucky I was to have a crowd in my own city.

It’s true. There is a great braintrust here and I’m doing everything I can to take advantage of it. Case in point…

Phil Buckley, SEO genius extraordinaire, decided to put together a completely free Wordpress Hackathon. He has organized it through Eventbrite and set up registration for wannabes, newbies, users, veterans, and masters of Wordpress. (Can you guess which one I registered as?)

I’m thrilled to pack up all my gear and pummel my fellow Wordpress bloggers with my top questions. None of them are too tough. Most of them are nitpicky kind of things.

But here is where you come in. If you aren’t as fortunate as I am to have access to all of these resources, then I am going to share them with you.

Need help with Wordpress? Here is what you need to do:

I will be your liaison to the experts. If you are a Wordpress user or a Wordpress wannabe, leave a comment with your Wordpress questions including your blog name and URL. I will do everything in my power to find out the answers to your questions.

And why will I do this? Because it’s all about bloggers helping other bloggers. And it will give me lots of good content for next week’s Tech Tuesday post

NOTE: Wordpress Hackathon is tonight, August 24th so get your questions in before 6:30 pm EST!

It’s time for your weekly sermon. And no, I’m not preaching to you. I’m telling you my observations from this weekend. I’m telling you that sermons can appear to you in the simplest ways. Mine came from a hummingbird stuck in the garage. Here’s the story.

Hummingbird enters through the open garage door and frantically flies all over the garage.

This seemed like a good idea a few minutes ago but now I have no idead what I’ve gotten myself into.

——

Hummingbird, who can’t probably grasp the concept of a ceiling, keeps flying up and up and up searching for a way out.

I made a mistake. I’m panicking. How do I get out of here?

——

We open the garage door and place an assortment of red items on the driveway to try to lure him out.

Look at the big bright light and pretty red things. I want to go out but I’m too scared. There are too many obstacles in my way.

——

The poor hummingbird keeps flying until he looks exhausted and takes a short rest.

I see the world outside but I don’t understand how to get there.

——

He is surrounded by our bicycles hanging from the ceiling. Something as simple as a bicycle pedal can look quite frightening when it’s bigger than you.

When I’m up close, everything seems so frightening.

——

We opened up the top of a window and removed the screen hoping that the hummingbird would feel comfortable popping out.

Back away from the problem and get perspective.

——

After waiting it out for a bit, we closed the garage door, darkened the room, and left the window open. When we returned a short while later, he had flown the coop.

Focus on the goal and let the obstacles fall away. Then the right opportunity will present itself.

——

LESSON LEARNED: Sometimes you have to go down in order to go up.

I was born many, many years ago. Then I was born again. Yes, I’m talking about Christianity. I’m talking about the laying-of-hands, dancing-in-the-spirit, speaking-in-tongues kind of born again Christianity.

That’s not who I am now. It doesn’t mean I don’t believe anything I believed when I was growing up in that spirit-filled faith. It just means that I don’t fit neatly into that box anymore. While there are lots of people that fit that description, oddly enough in the blogging world, I’m not that person.

And while growing up in what many saw as a somewhat radical/unusual/holy roller way of worship was never easy, there are pieces of it that I carry with me. There are memories and experiences and there are songs. The songs are what have stayed in my mind.

Yeah, I was a popular kid in middle school. While everyone was listening to “The Eye of the Tiger,” I was listening to “Bibleland.” When my friends were all going to the Def Leppard concert, I was going with my mom to see The Bill Gaither Trio. I did secretly listen to rock music in my room late at night on my clock radio with the volume so low I had to put my ear right on the speaker to hear it.

Most weekends, though, I would wake to my mom opening the windows (she’s never liked air conditioning) and blasting her Christian music. And besides the obvious theme, the songs were always about joy. They were songs of worship. Songs that I could never entirely relate to. Hold on, my child, joy comes in the morning.

Then I grew up. I went on my own spiritual journey, quite unintentionally. I tried on Jewish. I tried on Catholic. I looked at Mormon. I read books. I visited psychics. Somehow, on this journey, I figured out the meaning of life.

No, I’m serious. I did.

I’d love to share it with you but my meaning is different than yours. However, having a sense of purpose reshaped the way I approached almost every aspect of my life. I knew why we were here. I understood why things happened, whether we like them or not. I fully understood the consequences of the choices we make in our lives. And more importantly, I learned to embrace life in a new way. I felt joy.

Joy: my little boy, my doggie, a brownie

I still hate getting up early in the morning. I still haven’t quite figured out why we have gigantic spiders in this world. The fact that airplanes can fly still totally baffles me (even though I understand the physics behind it). I don’t understand the popularity of the Kardashians. And I can’t explain why anyone ever bought a Pontiac Aztek.

Joy: my husband building a family snowman in a rare March snowstorm

But when I wake up in the morning and know that I’m surrounded by a family I helped create, or when my second chance doggie excitedly learns to play after years of abuse, or I walk outside to see a bevvy of birds, butterflies, and dragonflies surrounding my flowers, I feel joy to know that I am alive. And even when I’m exhausted as a wife, as a mom, as a woman, I know that joy truly does come in the morning. Every morning.

Joy: a blue dragonfly perched atop my bee balm

This post is part of SOYJOY‘s What brings you joy contest. Learn more here.