Honestly, when I’m not writing a sponsored post or awesome product review, I immediately go inside my head. And it’s not always pleasant in there. Usually that’s what comes out on a Sunday morning. It’s not a banal story from the week. It’s like my Sunday morning therapy. So here you go and I’m sorry (or you’re welcome).
Here’s my 5 minute brain dump…
I am not by any means suggesting I am a selfless person. Although sometimes I am. I guess you have to be once you decide to become a mom. But it’s important to be a little selfish too.
Sometimes I think I suffer a wee bit from martyrdom. I want to do what I want to do but not at the expense of someone else, especially my family. I ask permission way to much.
I have to run to the grocery store. Is that okay? Will you be alright? Do you need anything?
Yes, there’s the point of being considerate which is what I always thought I was being. But sometimes considerate is annoying and I realize most people aren’t that way. It might be more like,
Hey, I really need to get out of the house. I’m going for a hike and should be back in about 2 hours.
The end. End of discussion. My son is 8. My husband is much older than 8. They can take care of themselves and they can live without me and when I come back from that time I’ve “demanded” for myself, they’re going to get a better me.
Something I’m learning lately is that I’m motivated by guilt. I’ll do something or not do something because I feel bad or guilty. I don’t want to leave the dogs alone all day. HELLO – they’re DOGS! Someone wants me to play croquet and I really don’t want to. It’s hot, I’m relaxing and I’m comfortable. I don’t want to do it. Sorry, Mom, I was being properly selfish!
I guess I’m wondering if anyone else has this problem. And I never really realized it was a problem until recently. And now I’m working on it but still treading that fine line between being selfish and self-centered.
If you’re going to be in NYC this week, I hope to see you there and we can be a wee bit selfish together.